I think my life right now would make a great TV show..... except if it had as few viewers as this blog has readers, It wouldn't make it past the pilot episode, Oh Well. Anywho, back to my show.......I can see it Grey's Anatomy-esque. Except for I'm going to be a nurse, not a surgeon. There is the whole relationship/whatever dramas with men all suddenly wanting me (including some of my close friends who know I'm with someone), all the while having no idea what to say other than "I'm just....with someone" because my own insecurities hinder every stinking thing I ever want and I over correct my actions thinking it will make things better when it makes them worse. I just want to be myself, I think that's what he wants too.... but I have so much to say, but no words to speak. when I do, they just don't sound right. I spent a long time looking inside after the last bad breakup I had, did alot of work to discover who I am and what I want, and finally decided to go for it. so not worth it. Just a matter of trying to find ways to make it work and no time to do it, especially when you haven't really had a good convo in a few days.
I don't even want to think about when I start clinicals at the hospital. right now I'm just trying to pass classes and labs when I failed penis washing. Yes! Penis washing! It's not like I haven't seen one or know what to do with it or anything. I'ts just a body part, but for some strange reason, plastic just isn't the same as the real thing. plus, I really doubt I am ever going to be in a situation where I am like "hi there! I am going to wash you now.....gee, did you know your stuff doesn't move?" I'm so going into OR when I get My RN, and med surg before that! something not involving penis washing! atleast I'm doing ok on paper.....96% on my first midterm today...wooohoooo all A's except for one high B...I'll get it up. then there is the in class drama...she hates her, who hates her, who hates me stuff....petty. then co-habitating with my g-ma and work drama added......blah. I even have my own version of Joe's going on. I'm telling you ...look out here it comes.
posted by Brisco @ 5:23 PM
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