Diary of an over~stressed Student

2007-04-25T12:32:00.000-07:00

Ok, if you haven't already noticed, this blog has temporarily been abandoned. I had to take time off school, but am returning august 27th, so i will start reposting then! in the meanwhile, i am keeping up dumb as a box

2006-08-07T19:38:00.000-07:00

Entry 17

I now love the OR even more!!. i got to follow the circulating nurse at the Fort today and I loved it even more than I ever thought I would, especially when they let me get in there and do stuff! I did a foley catheter (which i had never done on a person before), i got to help get patients, Help clean the room after surgery, set up for the next surgery, help place patients, all kinds of things. I can't wait until I get to go back! I am also more determined than ever to get my RN asap. I really want to do this!
I also have had the busiest past 2 weeks ever. EVER! I have started a new job waitressing at a small cafe on saturdays along with my current full time server/buffet job. I also started trying to hangout with my friends more which lead to the most unexpected outcome: I'm now dating one of my best guyfriends from highschool who has been one of my partybuddies for awhile now! I have liked him for a long time, but didn'y really realize he ever felt the same way. I got to flirting with him last thursday at a friends birthday party then just kinda went for it the following monday. we went on our first date and have had a blast ever since. Plus it's awesome that our frinds have been waiting for this for a lontg time......some for years! He is seriously the sweetest guy ever and I was really shocked when we went out. Plus the convo is great... we stayed up and talked until 5:30 am saturday/sunday! He also understands my schedule, which right now is pretty important...who knew! I also started school after a 2 week break, and trust me it's full speed ahead! Tests, quizzes, homework, Insanity! plus I had to make up the tests I missed the last week of school ( i was out with cysts.....AGAIN!!!) And failed one(which everyone did ) but i got an 96% on the other...but it's pharm, I rock at pharm(hence all the CRNA school offers) Ok, i jhave wrote enough this time. I will have to contenue this later

2006-06-29T04:29:00.000-07:00

ENTRY 16

I LOVE THE OR!!!! I was planning on going on to be a Nurse Practitioner, but after spending the most boring day of my life in the DR. office and seeing what a crappy job it is, they definitly can't pay me enough to work there. I am 99% sure I want to stop at my BSN and become a circulating nurse in an OR. I thought med/surg was great (which I kicked ass at BTW), But the OR was even better. When I was there, I got to see the set up for a total hip replacement, part of a bilateral knee replacement, and I got to stand at the head of a colon resectioning where I got to see the whole thing. It was amazing. I also may try for scrub tech certification as well since if they are short or need lunch relief, they pull nurses, and it is the coolest job...you get to be right there on the surgeries!
I also had the most awkward moment. I was standing away when they were doing the initial incision on the colon resectioning, when a med student comes in to observe and starts talking to me. I recognize his eyes right off the bat......My high school crush! So, I start talking, things are going well, no ring, we get to go closer to observe, then when we had to go back to the foot....BOOOM!!!!... he drops the bombshell...it's not my old crush, but his 19 year old baby brother. Unfortunately when my bubble broke, his didn't, and I think he realized this bc he brought up his brothers recent marriage really fast,but moved on to his 2 degrees and ortho plans. Bathroom break....STAT!!!

2006-06-25T20:50:00.000-07:00

Entry 15

Ok, So alot has changed since my last entry like this....well, my last entry in general to be honest since the only time I can even think about typing out an entry is at 1 am on my PDA. Even Dumb as a Box is suffering!
Just in case you didn't Know (because trust me, some people haven't realized yet), me and the Sgt. are are No longer together. he is shallow, a liar, and my grades dropped 10% while we were dating because I had no time to study. And yas...I am over it.
on top of everything else I have on my plate, I am only getting about 1 hour of sleep a night due to chickens. Yes, I live in town and am kept up all night by stupid illegal chickens. My upstairs neighbors got the bright idea that chickens in the house is a great idea and to move furniture at midnignt or 3. Well they don't have to get up at 5 am to pull clinicals at a hospital, and they will be thinking great idea when they have me knocking on their door at 5 am to complain about the noise. I am not a very happy camper after 3 days of no sleep. Graduation is less than 6 months away!

2006-06-04T12:38:00.000-07:00

Entry 14:

I'm moving on up...I finaly got a PDA. I pretty much had too. I am very rarely home and it looks weird carrying 5 college textbooks around town with you. plus, it cuts my study time in half. the fact it doubles as an MP3 player doesnt hurt either.

2006-05-25T15:39:00.000-07:00

Entry 13:

YAY!!!! My nursing home clinicals are over!!!!! it's not that I don't like the elderly or anything...I love old people...but The environment is just not for me. It's not what I want to do. After IV therapy, I get to work at the hospital so I am really excited. I am really tired now so i will write more on this post later.

2006-05-16T21:42:00.000-07:00

Entry 12

What I hope to be like at age 85

After spending two days a week for almost a month working at a long term care facility, I have learned a lot about what I will be like when I am older. Not just older…but elderly. I have had a chance to put myself in the shoes of the residents I am caring for, and have also had quite a bit of input from the same residents on this very subject. So here It is, me at 85.
Hopefully by age 85, the thighs, breasts, wrinkles and cellulite that I had surgically enhanced or repaired in my 50’s are still looking good, and if not, I will have a lifetime supply of Oil of Olay and vitamin E serum in my closet. Oh, and I have to have my facial set in there, facelifts only last 5 years. I will definitely be doing “The strut”, as one resident calls it when I walk, but I would have clothes on, unlike some people. If I was naked, the community would have to be a nudist colony or it would be illegal, and you can only run so fast with a walker. Speaking of running fast and walkers, I think I would also be somewhat of a cranky older person. I could hit someone who is bothering me or trying to wake me up with a stick and run as fast as I can. When I got caught, I could pretend to have multiple personalities and be really sweet. The whole “would you like a piece of candy, hun” kind of thing. Also, I think on days when I feel a bit silly, or maybe just lazy, I could mismatch my clothes, just for fun. Green pants with a sky blue shirt. Pink shoes with yellow socks. Who cares! What other time in your life after the age of 5 can you get away with something like that! Hey, It worked for great, great grandma D!
One of the perks of being me at 85, is that you still might be in the honeymoon phase of your marriage. Not just because you love one another and are happy to grow old together, but because you are actually newlyweds. The nurses better be knocking on our door, because it’s like they say….If you don’t use it you lose it….and no one wants to lose that. Another perk is that if you don’t want to hurry about something, you don’t have to….you can always blame it on the fact that as you get older, everything slows down. This is especially handy when it comes to driving. If the person behind you starts getting road rage, go 2 miles an hour with your blinker on just to make them mad. Then when they go to pass you, speed up to at least 5 over the speed limit so they know you have still got it. And lets not even talk about the acceptance of bodily functions!
In all honesty, all of these things are all good and well, But the most important things I hope to have when I am 85 are my basic needs met, health and happiness. With these three things, you have just about everything you need. A lot of people are not blessed enough to have these things, and anyone who does is very fortunate!

2006-04-06T14:59:00.000-07:00

Entry 11

Catheterization sucks!!! and not just for the patient! We had to do a lab on catheters last week and it was one of the crappiest things ever. On top of that I did it on less than 3 hours sleep....yay...I went out the night before since I hadn't had a night out since my birthday and ended up staying out until 1:30. bleh. although I realized how funny it really is to watch drunk people dance. It's like the dancing scene on "Merry Christmas Charlie Brown" on crack. tons of people doing their own one move dances to different beats. It was pretty funny!

2006-04-02T09:50:00.000-07:00

Entry 10

I quit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yes I actually quit my job! After 3 months of crap, I finally did it. I am going back this week to see if I truely want to quit, but I think tonight or tomorrow night after talking to a few people I may just give my 2 weeks. I got into a fight with a co-worker who is impossible sometimes...I am too mad to even get into it, but she is one of my friends so it makes it even worse. I am a really nice person, or atleast try to be, and I will take alot, but I have a slight temper. I will say something first and if you keep making me mad, I will cry. If I stop crying.....RUN....because I will hit. I may be 5 foot nothing but if I hit, something will be broken. grrrr!
Also, I think the fact that I am always worn out doesn't help things any. People think I run and play all of the time, but honestly, when I do go out, it is for an hour, maybe two, plus I always have to leave early and am the responsible one who makes sure everyone gets home ok. no parties. no eating a full meal. nothing. I don't even have time to date anyone because I have to set aside a time slot on a day when I dont have much going on, but what guy wants to drive here to go out for an hour and a half on a tuesday night??? My grades dropped with the last BF, and I can't afford it again. Oh well.....less than 9 months to go!

2006-03-19T12:21:00.000-08:00

Entry 9

I Aced venipuncture!!!!!!! no arterial sprays, no blood clots, just good ol' vacutainers full of liquid! My vitals lab went good also, plus after my lab, I had to do vitals on a teacher from a different class.I can't believe I was nervous about all of this! I also found a way that after I become an LPN, I can go to college while working at a hospital and get my nurse practitioners license. I think that is what I really want to do. there are so many things i could accomplish with that, plus it pays about as much as a DR. does. I would have to bring my nutrition grade up to an A, but considering I have an 89.9 in there, i don't think it will be too hard. Now I have even more motivation to do my best. before it was just being good enough to get my license, and possibly get into an RN bridge program. Now It's the possibility of acheiving my ultimate childhood dream of having a career where I can truely make a difference on a large scale and cross another task off in the goal book!

we also found out about our clinical rotations! I start out in a residential care facility in a podunk town about 25 miles out in the boonies. but then I go to my local hospital, then "the land of my ex's" general (lol), and finally a really nice hospital by the lake. Plus the group of women i am with is awesome, so I am really lucky!

On a different note, last night was my "second 21st" birthday party, also known as my 22nd. most of my friends had forgot about my birthday last year and my new and renewed friends all decided I needed a huge bash, and it was great! about 25 invited guests floated in and out, not counting the people who knew me who just showed up. at the place we had it at, they have the birthday persons friends do quick lap dances for them, and let's just say if they would have let my whole line go through, there would have been 3 or 4 songs at least. It was honestly the best party ever held there. The luau decorations were amazing, everyone had a blast, and :P to all those who said it would suck!!!! ok, well I am feeling really sick (I have had this weird cold for over a week) and i gotta go to work, so I am stopping here!

2006-03-11T13:02:00.000-08:00

Entry 8:

I am not so sure about venipuncture anymore. I was doing ok, then we went to do it on this fake arm and i absolutely sucked at it, some of it was nerves i am sure...but still. I will be even more nervous when it's a real arm, i just know it. but hey, atleast i can become a CNA in june before becoming an LPN in december.a little bit of a closer goal to look forward to, plus, no venipuncture! :)

2006-02-27T18:21:00.000-08:00

Entry 7:

I swear, If I did sex education, we wouldn't have any teen moms because no one would want to have sex. I am doing a paper for my Growth and development class on STD's and am grossing myself out, and after relaying info, my friends are now pretty grossed out too. Did you know that around 1 in every 4 people have genital herpes, some not even knowing it until way later? and that's just one STD! Think about all of the people who dont have herpes, but have other STD's. you can also get pretty much any STD throgh oral and anal sex, plus you can get syphyllis from kissing? HPV or genital warts causes both cervical and Penile cancer, which cancer can lead to removal of the affected area. yeah. And don't even make me start breaking out the pictures and start listing disgusting symptoms. I am not even halfway through my first trimester and am already grossed out, not by blood, guts, or bodily secretions, but by the behavior of other people, not just about STD's, but in general.

2006-02-21T17:23:00.000-08:00

Entry 6:

I think my life right now would make a great TV show..... except if it had as few viewers as this blog has readers, It wouldn't make it past the pilot episode, Oh Well. Anywho, back to my show.......I can see it Grey's Anatomy-esque. Except for I'm going to be a nurse, not a surgeon. There is the whole relationship/whatever dramas with men all suddenly wanting me (including some of my close friends who know I'm with someone), all the while having no idea what to say other than "I'm just....with someone" because my own insecurities hinder every stinking thing I ever want and I over correct my actions thinking it will make things better when it makes them worse. I just want to be myself, I think that's what he wants too.... but I have so much to say, but no words to speak. when I do, they just don't sound right. I spent a long time looking inside after the last bad breakup I had, did alot of work to discover who I am and what I want, and finally decided to go for it. so not worth it. Just a matter of trying to find ways to make it work and no time to do it, especially when you haven't really had a good convo in a few days.
I don't even want to think about when I start clinicals at the hospital. right now I'm just trying to pass classes and labs when I failed penis washing. Yes! Penis washing! It's not like I haven't seen one or know what to do with it or anything. I'ts just a body part, but for some strange reason, plastic just isn't the same as the real thing. plus, I really doubt I am ever going to be in a situation where I am like "hi there! I am going to wash you now.....gee, did you know your stuff doesn't move?" I'm so going into OR when I get My RN, and med surg before that! something not involving penis washing! atleast I'm doing ok on paper.....96% on my first midterm today...wooohoooo all A's except for one high B...I'll get it up. then there is the in class drama...she hates her, who hates her, who hates me stuff....petty. then co-habitating with my g-ma and work drama added......blah. I even have my own version of Joe's going on. I'm telling you ...look out here it comes.

2006-02-19T16:18:00.000-08:00

Entry 5:

ok, this officially sucks! I don't think I have ever had a weekend go quite this bad!
Friday night: I was leaving from work, glad to have plenty of time to get my homework done before a busy weekend( I have two projects and 2 or 3 worksheetsdue by tuesday) when two of the teens I work with needed a ride home and said they could't get one from anyone else, hesitantly I agreed thinking it would be a good deed and only a couple minutes out of my night. yeah, right. I waited for them for awhile, we get in my car, pull in front of the restraunt, and my car died! not just stopped running, but completely died! we had to have a tow truck start it and follow me! oh, ya, and the girls who were rideless? they had a ride in five seconds and left me standing in the freezing cold (it was -7 wind chill that night)coatless, until way after 10 and I got to bed at 3, no homework done. good stuff. Atleast I have a date tomorrow morning.....

Saturday: BF had cancelled. So I was bumming around when he calls so I run like a freak to get ready when we decide to go out anyways. looked like POOP! but, he surprised me with car looking and after decinding to try to keep my junker, it was all good. went to work and saw my schedule...oh crap! the way it is, I have time for no extras...school /work only pretty much, plus I have to leave class early one day just to make it to work.....ya, I'm screwed if they don't fix it. no homework done. but hey, I can go to that basketball game i wanted to go to....

Sunday: Ok, realized no b-ball game b/c i have no car and no one to go with since they all work that night. missed out on everything that happened last night since I couldn't go out with my friends after work since I was carless. got a recap, but it just isn't the same. Realized how bad the rest of the week will suck and how dirty my bedroom was (it has been neglected) so I cleaned on it, fell asleep, and just now realized I am going to be late for work since I have to get a ride and I am still in my jammies. looks like no homework done tonight either!

2006-02-13T18:18:00.000-08:00

Entry 4:Am I going to nursing school, or training for a circus.....because I am doing more juggling than a clown with multiple personalities. Classes, work, studying, homework, boyfriend, and still spending time with friends doesn't really all fit into a 24 hour day, and don't forget about sleeping or eating. It's crazy! Plus then there is the drama. lots of drama. for me, it's grades. I have always just flew through everything i have done and got something if i really wanted it.....not here. It's a hard adjustment to go from goofing off to working like a freak just to get by. This probably sounds funny to some people, but I carry around a strange reminder of what i am working for: my stethoscope. Yes, this is more of a necessity than a reminder, but my cousin got me a really nice one with some other med equipment as a gift, and to me this is motivation.It reminds me that I have a lot of people who believe that I can do this, even when I don't. plus the $13,000 that I have to pay back if I quit or fail doesn't exactly hurt either. oh well, only 10 more months to go!

2006-01-31T17:43:00.000-08:00

Entry 3:

I'm not saying this in a racist way...I promise. some of my closest friends are black and hispanic, but why do they get treated better? and they do, especially when it comes to financial aid. Minority scholorships, united negro college fund, hispanic heritage, multi- cultural, ratio upkeep.... It all cuts me, a white girl, out. One of my friends told me it's because of the minority poverty percentage and as an initiative to keep kids off of the streets and such, but there are white kids out there facing the same problems who don't qualify for one red cent. Plus, if someone set up "The poor white kids fund", the ACLU would come down on them so fast you would think the sky is falling. You can restrict giving money to black, asian, hispanic or whatever kids, as long as you give it a good name. so unfair. If you can give me a real reason why these scholorships are there and why they are positive, I would really like to hear it, because right now my "up to here in student loans" eyes need to look for me a third job.

2006-01-31T17:41:00.000-08:00

Entry 2

Friday was a very sad day for me. I have had the stomach flu for a week now (see # 2 below) and it made me kill my first person in pharmacology class, OD'd a kid w/ antibiotics and he went fast when i misconverted pounds to kilograms. Thank goodness it was just a word problem and not real life, but still I have not made a mistake in that class yet! And it had to be with the teacher watching me! I passed with an 80% on the test I was worried about, but we get progress reports tomorrow, so I will just have to wait to see my grades. Oh, ya...and I passed my restraints lab with flying colors, if you have a comment on this email, don't post it. jk lol

On a different note, over the holidays I committed the one sin that soooooo many of us take part in .....Gluttony A.K.A. eating so much food I now wear 3 pants sizes bigger than I did in September. you wpuld think after 20 years of eating actual holiday meals at the table I would know when to refuse that last piece of pie. I came up with this list of tricks we hear constantly and I have added comments on what happened when i tried them. Hopefully the good ones will help this year too, and the bad ones....well, maybe someone else will be spared the frustration.

1. Take everything one step at a time- eat right, then when that’s mastered, exercise with it and contenue to add this one is 100% true. It is so much easier to stick with it, plus its better to master one health goal permanently than to achieve them all for a couple weeks. Plus, keep your workout varied, it keeps you interested. why do you think celebs switch so much?

2. you usually lose weight when you are sick especially if you have the new intestinal/stomach flu that is going around this year. I have had it for a week sofar, and with your diet consisting of soup, crackers, and slim fast if that, the pounds melt away.

3. Diet with friends- make it a contest! this only works if you both are about the same size and need to get fit in the same way, otherwise it can cause hurt feelings very quickly. Plus, It really stinks when your workout buddy has 2% body fat and your butt looks like vibrating jell-o when you use the treadmill.

4. Eat half, save the rest for another meal- really great idea when at restraunts where a meal is actually 3 or 4 servings. Also pre portioning things makes you think about how much you are eating. I feel worse having to eat a second meal rather than the double size portion.

5. Add exercise into daily tasks- it may not be equivelant to 45 minutes at the gym, but contract abs when cleaning or park in the back of the parking lot so it doesn't feel like exercise. This one is great also because it takes almost 0 time out of your day. some exercise is better than none.

6. Add color and flavor to food- it makes you feel more full and eat less this one ranks with the "goal picture". It can be good or bad. either it makes you full or want more, i guess it depends on how good it is! I suggest veggies, whole grains and tons of fiber if you are trying to make a dish more filling, far more definite without extra calories or bad stuff.

7.find something that makes you happy ( healthily ) and do it often! this may work if it is a workout, or say, carrots but no, my happy thing was juice....healthy but packs on the pounds. 15 pounds later I switched to diet juice. semi-happy, but just not the same.

8. If you cheat, cheat right! When you crave junk food, give in, but just a few bites the three bite rule is my best friend! If you don't give in, you will later, and when you do, you will big time . Its better to give into 50 calories now thaan 500 later. Also keeping healthy alternatives.

9.give up soda- just one bottle a day is over 300 calories I lost 10-15 lbs because of this

10. Use the grill for everything cuts fat and calories and tastes sooo much better
11. Use smaller, darker plates, it makes you think your eating a lot more than you are, why do you think buffet plates are smaller and never snow white? bull

12. If you feel hungry for a snack get up, get a drink, do something, and then see if you still want it - it may be boredom or thirst. or stress, it really does work.

13. Make meals on the go interesting- pack a different healthy interesting food everyday, you will have a yummy lunch and not want that burger/fry combo next to ya, plus save the gas of getting it! nope. if i really want a big mac, i'm going to go get it

14. Use quality and moderation to your food and workout, if you go slow, you get more out of it! tiny bites works wonders

15. CHART YOUR SUCCESS nope, just depresses me

16. Don’t weigh yourself, measure yourself weight is so inaccurate! you can be lean and weigh more

2006-01-31T17:31:00.000-08:00

Entry 1

I started classes on January 3rd, and have not been able to do so much as breathe ever since! Between school, work, and working odd jobs doing things I'm not too fond of (nothing illegal, I promise), time is NOT on my side, not to mention the stress of trying to pay over $1000 a month in bills with $400... It doesn't work too well. I really wish people would realize that a waitress makes less than 25 cents an hour in wages since tips are heavily taxed and we have to claim 100% of earnings. Don't get me wrong, I am greatful for everything given to me, and i understand that some people give all they can or received lousy service...... but when you devote an hours worth of your time waiting on a table of 8 people who you know are decently well off and make $3 including your wages because "they all got the buffet" (which is actually harder on the waitress due to clearing tons of plates) it's pretty depressing. Atleast my grades are doing ok, so far 2 A's and 2 B's, which is amazing considering the only time I get to actually study is 5 minutes before the test, but this week, I think it all may change. I have a test in the only subject I am having trouble with and am scared to death! Hopefully I will do ok, and maybe the 6 hours i spent doing assigned notes over a chapter will somehow burn it to memory. I severely doubt it, but maybe. If anyone out there has a great tip on how to make money multiply in large amounts legally, learn by osmosis or study during sleeping, I would love to know.....until then , I will have to take my 3 hours of sleep and make the most of it.